A Little Sunshine in a Dark Week

Today, I found out a fellow angel mom had nominated me for the Sunshine Award! I was shocked and touched to receive this acknowledgement, and it couldn’t have come at a better time! I always try to maintain a positive attitude and sense of humor with all the ups and downs of trying to conceive and recurrent pregnancy loss, but lately I have to admit that I have been struggling with it all. I had a mini breakdown last night and found myself going to a really dark place full of bitterness, anger and self loathing. Then, this morning I logged onto my blog and discovered this little gift. Thank you so much Recurrently Lost for your nomination and for brightening my day! This angel mom always writes from the heart and her stories have been a constant inspiration to me. I am so honored that she thought of me.

Thoughts on the Sunshine Award

When I received my nomination, I immediately tried to do a search about it and learn more, and was confused at first when I couldn’t find a website for the Award. I could only find other bloggers who had received the award nomination and had posted about it on their blogs. I then went to my nominee’s blog, Recurrently Lost and found the same post shared on her blog. So it would seem that this is more of a virtual award that connects bloggers who are talking about the same things and want to acknowledge each other. How simply wonderful this is! The Sunshine Award has created the perfect platform for connecting us, acknowledging us, and validating why we write. I think this is amazing, and I am truly honored to have been nominated!

How the Sunshine Award works:

  • Include the Sunshine Award icon in your post (done).
  • Link the blogger who nominated you (absolutely).
  • Answer 10 questions about yourself (done, see below).
  • Nominate 10 other bloggers to receive the award (done, see below).
  • Link to your nominees and let them know you nominated them (looking forward to it!).

Recurrently Lost’s Questions

1. Why do you blog?
When I created my blog 4 months ago, I had just experienced another loss and had hit an all-time low. I had people in my life I could talk to about it, but I could tell it was starting to take it’s toll on them and I was also angry that most people in my life had no idea what I had been going through. And then I realized I didn’t have to keep it a secret any more. Blogging has given me the outlet to share my story, feelings, hopes and dreams about recurrent pregnancy and infant loss. The best thing about creating my blog has been the connections I have made. I am now part of a community of amazing and brave women. I wanted to create a community of hope for all angel mom’s who are going through this, and now I realize the community was already out there and I have been welcomed with open arms. You are all my inspiration and hope.

2. What is your favorite book?
Harry Potter Series – I cry every time I read these books! J.K. Rowling’s stories about an orphaned boy, who goes through some pretty horrible experiences and against unimaginable obstacles and heartache, he overcomes it, defeats the evil in his life, and achieves his dreams of peace and family in the end.

3. What is your dream vacation?
Taking a Mediterranean cruise is my dream vacation, but a week in Mexico on the beach sounds pretty dreamy right now too!

4. What is your guilty pleasure?
There are so many! I guess these days it would have to be a big glass of wine, brie cheese and dark chocolate. Alcohol, soft cheese and sugar. The trifecta of bad things my acupuncturist has told me to limit or at least moderate, and I find myself wanting them more and more! My fertility doctor (bless him) told me to live a little and have wine and soft cheese and anything else I want right now. He said, you’ll be pregnant soon and won’t be able to have them, so give yourself a break. This is why we love Dr. J!

5. If you could tell your teenage self one thing, what would it be?
Don’t change anything. For better and for worse, I am who I am now because of the choices I made when I was young. Although, life is difficult right now, I have many blessings to be thankful for. Also, there have been several moments in my life when I thought it couldn’t get any worse and I would pray for it to all get better, and then I’d look back years later and realize that it did work out after all.

6. What is your biggest fear?
Losing my husband. I would be completely lost without him.

7. What is your biggest dream?
I have to echo Recurrently Lost’s answer: the obvious answer is giving birth to a healthy baby. There’s no greater dream than this for me.

8. What are you most proud of?
My angel son Holdon. Although he is in Heaven now, my greatest pride and joy is my son. The way my angel fought every day of those 3 1/2 months of his life to survive was the most incredible thing I’ve ever witnessed. I think he would have fought forever. His poor, tired, little body gave out, but his spirit never did. He made me realize that even one so small can have great strength.

9. What is your best piece of advice?
Don’t be too hard on yourself and never lose faith. Life is cyclical. Eventually it has to take a turn and get better.

10. What makes you happy?
Foremost, my husband. Then (in no particular order), my parents, my husband’s parents, our siblings, and our nieces and nephews, good friends and friends’ children.  Also, my kitties Bugs and Foggy. Their daily mischief and antics always make me laugh!

My Nominees

Recurrently Lost
First and foremost, I have to renominate my nominee! This angel mom is a true gift and inspiration to me. I’m truly honored to have connected with you in the RPL blogging world. I hope we will be part of the happy ending blogging community one day soon!

Not When But If

Project Sweet Pea

A Calm Persistence

A Mourning Mom

Me vs Myself

Coral Blooms

Preparing for a B-Squirt

On the Other Side of the Belly Button

My Life As A Case Study


Your questions – I cheated and used some of  the questions that were asked of me – they were good ones 🙂

  1. Why do you blog?
  2. What is your favorite movie?
  3. What is your favorite food?
  4. What is your favorite thing or memory about your spouse?
  5. What do you do to relieve stress?
  6. Who or what inspires you?
  7. What is your biggest fear?
  8. What is your biggest dream?
  9. What is your best piece of advice?
  10. What are you most proud of?

Can’t wait to hear all your answers!

5 thoughts on “A Little Sunshine in a Dark Week

  1. So happy you are getting such amazing support through all this. Your determination and strength will get you through this. Love you.

    1. I’m loving the Sunshine Award more and more! What a wonderful way to learn a little more about each other! Thank you for sharing! I especially loved your Cars – Behind the Clouds quote. So perfectly said! Congratulations again on your little peanut. I will continue to pray for you for a safe and healthy pregnancy. Fingers crossed this is it for you <3

Comments are closed.