Waiting… Wishing… Hoping…

Yesterday, I started a daily distraction activity to get me through this next week of waiting to hear how my embryos are doing and whether any of them are viable after PGD. The first distraction activity was decorating our Christmas Tree. Above is a picture of my special memory ornaments for my angels. The three snowflakes are the same ones A Calm Persistence blogged about finding at Kohl’s in her post It was just one of those days…. She purchased them for her angel babies and was extremely generous in sharing where she found them so others could get them too. I absolutely loved them and went out a few days later and got them for my own angel babies. The three snowflakes are for each of my miscarriages with the birth stone for each due date: April 18th for my first miscarriage, December 20th for my second miscarriage and January 5th for my most recent miscarriage. The two angel ornaments are for my son, my angel Holdon. One angel holds his birthstone for April 6th and the blue angel above it was a gift from my mother, and it holds his picture. These 5 ornaments are my most cherished…Continue reading Waiting… Wishing… Hoping…

IVF and PGD: Go Embryos Go!

We have 6 more embryos! Of the 9 eggs we retrieved yesterday, 6 were mature and all 6 fertilized! I’m beyond thrilled. My hubby’s little swimmers really did their job! This afternoon they thawed the 5 fertilized eggs we got in September and we now have 11 growing embryos! The embryologist will do a biopsy on all the embryos that survive to day 5 blastocyst and send the biopsies to the PGD lab for testing. This should occur Saturday and Sunday (Saturday for the new embryos and Sunday for the the thawed embryos), and we should get the results by next Tuesday. So by this time next week we’ll know if we have any viable embryos for transfer. I have no idea how I’m going to get through the next week! I’m hopeful, anxious, nervous, scared, and so many other feelings I can’t even describe all at the same time! Please, please let our embryos survive to 5-day blast and let us have a healthy embryo! Knowing myself, I won’t be able to go 5 minutes without freaking out about our embryos and Googling the statistics and success rates of 5-day blast survival and PGD. Who am I kidding? I’m…Continue reading IVF and PGD: Go Embryos Go!

IVF and PGD Part 2– Egg Retrieval #2

Early this morning we had our second egg retrieval, and so far it went well. First and foremost, we got 9 eggs this time which is 2 more than last time! I was so relieved to hear this, but now we have to wait and see how many are mature and fertilize. Last time we got 7 eggs, but only 6 were mature and 5 fertilized. So that was a really good percentage of fertilized eggs for the number of eggs we started with. I pray we are equally successful this time! All in all the procedure was about the same as last time. We arrived at the clinic OR at 6:15 this morning as directed by the nurse for the hour prep time needed prior to our 7:15 retrieval time. Since I was the first patient of the day, things moved along pretty quick. We filled out the same consent forms as last time, and then I was taken into the pre-op area. I got undressed and put on the lovely retrieval ensemble consisting of hospital gown, booties and surgical cap. Then, the nurse took my vitals and prepared my IV. This part went much smoother this time. Last…Continue reading IVF and PGD Part 2– Egg Retrieval #2

IVF and PGD Part 2 – The Eve of Our Second Egg Retrieval

It’s 11: 30 pm on the eve of our second retrieval, and I can’t sleep so I decided to get up and make myself a cup steamed almond milk before my “no food or drink after midnight” cutoff. The same thing happened to me last time. I went to be early in hopes of getting a good night’s sleep before the procedure, but tossed and turned for hours. I understand why it was so hard last time. I had not done this before so I was worried and nervous about the procedure, and I was really worried about the outcome. However, this time I know what to expect so I really thought I would be able to rest easier tonight, but as it gets later and later, and I get closer to my 4:45 am wake up time, I’m even more and more worried. I guess it’s because if all goes well tomorrow, we’ll finally be moving forward with the PGD and that has me even more scared. Sigh… Will I ever rest easy again? Who knows… I guess for now I just have to be thankful that we’ve made it this far and wait and see what happens. So…Continue reading IVF and PGD Part 2 – The Eve of Our Second Egg Retrieval

IVF and PGD Part 2 – Trigger Day!

Image Source: Pinterest and stayinspired365.com Today is trigger day! Woohoo! This morning I kissed the hubby goodbye on my way out the door to my monitoring appointment and asked him to say a little prayer that we were good to go, and it must have worked because Dr. J announced that everything looked great and we’re ready to do the trigger! I have 6 follicles measuring between 19 to 21 mm and a few stragglers that will hopefully catch up by Monday. We’ll see what we actually get at the retrieval, but 6 is still a pretty good number since we already have the 5 frozen fertilized eggs from our retrieval in September. Praying it will be enough to get us to 5-day blast and have at least one healthy embryo after PGD! I’m so relieved we’re ready to trigger. Aside from the obvious relief of moving forward to the next step, I’m beyond ready to be done with the injections. I did the usual Lupron shot this morning and then 1 last vial of Menopur and 200 units of Follistim at the clinic to give my follicles that extra boost for final maturation, and then at exactly 8:15 this…Continue reading IVF and PGD Part 2 – Trigger Day!

IVF and PGD Part 2 – Injections Day 8

Today is definitely the worst day in the entire process so far. For one, I’m really not feeling great. I still have the weird throbbing headache, and now I also feel foggy and tired and my stomach has been queasy for the past 2 days. I think it’s the HGH causing these newest symptoms because I didn’t feel this awful last time. If that wasn’t bad enough, my husband had to stay late at work tonight. He thought he’d be home in time to do the meds, but when 7:00 pm came along and he wasn’t home yet, I realized I would have to give myself my injections. After panicking for a few minutes, I slowly started getting the meds together, all the while mentally preparing myself for the task at hand. Once I had all the meds laid out on a tray, I sat there for a good 10 minutes psyching myself up and praying that my husband would walk through the door and save me. But he still wasn’t home by 7:30 pm, and I’m supposed to take them at 7:00 pm every day, give or take an hour. He did eventually get home to help me, but…Continue reading IVF and PGD Part 2 – Injections Day 8

IVF and PGD Part 2 – Injections Day 5

I’m 5 days into this round of meds (day 3 of Stims and HGH), and to say I’m feeling off is a bit of an understatement. Other than feeling like a pin cushion, physically I’m not too bad. Although I have to ask, why does Menopur burn so much when it’s injected? The Lupron is fine, the Follistim is fine, even the HGH is fine. Other than that initial prick, they’re all manageable, but the darned Menopur feels like I’m being injected with fire. Seriously? What the heck? Has anyone else felt this? Other than that, I still have that throbbing headache, but it’s not as bad as it was a few days ago. I’m also feeling a bit queasy, but it’s not too bad either. The most noticeable physical side-effect so far is I can really feel my ovaries. I know that sounds weird but they feel achy and huge. I’m still early into my Stims so I hope this is a good sign that there are lots of follicles starting to grow and not hyper stimulation or something scary like that. I have an appointment with Dr. J on Monday for an ultrasound so I’ll find out how…Continue reading IVF and PGD Part 2 – Injections Day 5

IVF and PGD Part 2 – Injections

Meds, Meds, Meds My hubby and I are becoming experts at preparing and administering all these meds. I get the tray ready with the vials, needles, gauze, alcohol wipes, and sharps container and my hubby prepares the meds and does the sticking. He’s becoming such a pro! It’s such a relief! I just can’t get the nerve to do it myself. For all of you out there who do this yourself, I am very impressed! To recap, we’re on a pretty intense schedule for meds this time around. So far it’s been a breeze with just 1 injection of Lupron (Leuprolide Acetate) at 7 am and 1 injection of Lupron at 7 pm. My only notable side effect so far is a really bad headache. It’s a bit better today, but it seems to get worse about 4 hours after each injection. I’ve read on other blogs that, headaches are a pretty typical side effect of the Lupron, and I had headaches last time with the other meds too so it was expected. Dr. J recommended upping my electrolytes last time so I stocked up on Gaterade this time and I think it’s helping. Even though we won’t be transferring…Continue reading IVF and PGD Part 2 – Injections

IVF with PGD: Egg Retrieval Part 2 – Update #2

And I thought I had a lot of meds last time! When I last left off talking about my upcoming procedures, I had to take birth control pills for 18 days before beginning my next round. This is the first step in the protocol for a long IVF cycle before starting the stimulating medications and egg retrieval. This is the second time I’ve had to do this, and it’s all leading up to getting as many embryos as we can in order to have the best outcome for the real reason why we’re doing all of this, Preimplantation Genetic Diagnosis (PGD). I know it’s supposed to help the process and give us the best possible outcome, but it really feels counterproductive. So do the condoms we have to use to make sure we don’t “accidentally” get pregnant on our own while in the middle of all this. There have been so many moments in the past few months that I have just wanted to say to heck with all this and get pregnant on our own again and maybe, just maybe the next time we’ll catch a good egg and it will all work out, but with my track record,…Continue reading IVF with PGD: Egg Retrieval Part 2 – Update #2

IVF with PGD: Egg Retrieval Part 2 – Update

We are officially beginning our second round in the IVF and PGD process. I went in yesterday for an ultrasound and blood draw to test my estradiol levels. All was good, so Dr J gave me the go ahead to begin taking birth control pills again. I’ll take the pills for the next 17 days, then stop and get another period, then I’ll start injections again and my next egg retrieval is tentatively booked for Dec 1st or 2nd. If we get enough eggs and enough fertilize, then we’ll grow the new embryos and the 5 we have frozen to 5-day blast and on the 5th day, they’ll take a biopsy of each embryo and send it to the PGD lab for chromosomal testing. So we should know by around Dec 6th or 7th if we have any viable embryos. If we do, we’ll likely wait until the end of that cycle and one more before doing the transfer. So sometime in mid January we will hopefully be ready to transfer an embryo. I’m feeling a little more positive today. When I wrote my last post, I wasn’t feeling very positive about moving forward this time around, but I’m feeling…Continue reading IVF with PGD: Egg Retrieval Part 2 – Update