Yesterday was the one year anniversary of the due date for miscarriage #2. It was a pretty rough day. I spent the morning moping around the house, feeling sorry for myself. If things were different, we would have been celebrating a first birthday for Christmas this year. And when I thought about that, my thoughts started spiraling down the would-have, should-have been path of all the things that could have been. If I had a normal, healthy pregnancy with my first, and didn’t get Preeclampsia/HELLP Syndrome, I would have delivered my son full term and he would be with us right now. We’d have a rambunctious 3 ½ year old boy full of joy and excitement for Christmas. If my second pregnancy hadn’t resulted in a miscarriage at 6 weeks, we would have a 2 ½ year old girl or boy. If pregnancy #3 hadn’t resulted in my second miscarriage, we would have a 1 year old right now. And if my last miscarriage hadn’t happened, I’d be going in for a c-section right about now—I can’t have a vaginal delivery because of my emergency c-section at 27 weeks with my first pregnancy (another regret)—but instead, all of these pregnancies went wrong,…Continue reading What Should Have Been