My Last Miscarriage

Today is the due date for pregnancy #4 and miscarriage #3. It was the last miscarriage I had, and I pray it truly is the last. Two weeks ago, when I talked about miscarriage #2, I dreaded today and thinking about miscarriage #3, but now that it’s here, I’m strangely okay. I think I have to credit it to my last minute change of attitude towards my birthday. Yesterday I turned 37. For months I have been dreading it. It’s not because of getting older. That has never really bothered me and I’ve always felt pretty young at heart (though the toll all these losses has taken out on my body and emotions has made me feel ancient at times), but when you’re trying to build a family, every year that goes by and every year you age, counts. Almost exactly this time last year, I had the go ahead to start trying again after my hysteroscopy and 8-month long drawn out process from miscarriage #2, and now it’s been another year, and another loss. The fact that I had another miscarriage in that time and the due date is the day after my birthday, had me in quite a…Continue reading My Last Miscarriage

IVF and PGD Part 2 – Injections Day 8

Today is definitely the worst day in the entire process so far. For one, I’m really not feeling great. I still have the weird throbbing headache, and now I also feel foggy and tired and my stomach has been queasy for the past 2 days. I think it’s the HGH causing these newest symptoms because I didn’t feel this awful last time. If that wasn’t bad enough, my husband had to stay late at work tonight. He thought he’d be home in time to do the meds, but when 7:00 pm came along and he wasn’t home yet, I realized I would have to give myself my injections. After panicking for a few minutes, I slowly started getting the meds together, all the while mentally preparing myself for the task at hand. Once I had all the meds laid out on a tray, I sat there for a good 10 minutes psyching myself up and praying that my husband would walk through the door and save me. But he still wasn’t home by 7:30 pm, and I’m supposed to take them at 7:00 pm every day, give or take an hour. He did eventually get home to help me, but…Continue reading IVF and PGD Part 2 – Injections Day 8

IVF and PGD Part 2 – Injections Day 5

I’m 5 days into this round of meds (day 3 of Stims and HGH), and to say I’m feeling off is a bit of an understatement. Other than feeling like a pin cushion, physically I’m not too bad. Although I have to ask, why does Menopur burn so much when it’s injected? The Lupron is fine, the Follistim is fine, even the HGH is fine. Other than that initial prick, they’re all manageable, but the darned Menopur feels like I’m being injected with fire. Seriously? What the heck? Has anyone else felt this? Other than that, I still have that throbbing headache, but it’s not as bad as it was a few days ago. I’m also feeling a bit queasy, but it’s not too bad either. The most noticeable physical side-effect so far is I can really feel my ovaries. I know that sounds weird but they feel achy and huge. I’m still early into my Stims so I hope this is a good sign that there are lots of follicles starting to grow and not hyper stimulation or something scary like that. I have an appointment with Dr. J on Monday for an ultrasound so I’ll find out how…Continue reading IVF and PGD Part 2 – Injections Day 5